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a texting conversation with Bailey

ME: WHAT IF THE LITTLE GIRL IS ACTUALLY YOU IN THE FUTURE. WHAT IF YOU ARE A FOBWATCHED TIMELADY AND SOMEDAY YOU WILL REGENERATE INTO A LITTLE GIRL AND VISIT 1969.

blienky27 : YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT, DAMNIT

ME: HOW DO YOU KNOW I'M NOT YOUR COMPANION PROTECTING YOU IN YOUR HUMAN STATE? WHO'S KNOWN ALL ALONG?

blienky27: BUT...THEN YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL ME UNTIL I GET UN-FOBWATCHED!

ME: WELL YES, WHICH WAS SUPPOSED TO BE TODAY, BUT UNFORTUNATELY THE WATCH SEEMS TO BE...MISSING. OOPS.

blienky27: ......CHRISTIIIIIIIIIIINE!

ME: IT'S NOT MY FAULT, THERE WERE SOME DALEKS AND EXPLOSIONS AND A MULTIPLICITY DUPLICATOR AND SOME CHEESE AND BASICALLY THEY'VE STOLEN IT. I'M TRYING TO ARRANGE A TRADE TO GET IT BACK I PROMISE

blienky27: I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT THE DALEKS AND CHEESE BEFORE, GOODNESS: BRIE ONLY. NEVER CAMEMBERT. YOU NEVER LEARN, DO YOU?

ME: SEE! YOU'RE STARTING TO REMEMBER! I CAN'T TELL YOU WHAT A RELIEF IT IS TO FINALLY BE ABLE TO STOP PRETENDING I'M A DISABLED COLLEGE STUDENT, PROFESSOR.

blienky27: OH GOODNESS I HAVE SUCH A HEADACHE. I THINK YOU'D BETTER GET THIS SORTED OUT QUICKLY, COMPANION OF MINE. GOOD THINKING TRYING TO KEEP ME SAFE IN JAPAN, THOUGH
 
ME: YEAH THE DALEKS GENERALLY STEER CLEAR OF JAPAN, WE JUST HAD BAD TIMING. HMM...D'YOU THINK THEY'D ACCEPT  FANCY WHEELCHAIR IN RETURN FOR THE WATCH? SEEING AS HOW I NO LONGER NEED IT
 
blienky27: PROBABLY, ESPECIALLY IF YOU TRY TO PASS IT OFF AS A PROTO-DALEK. IT JUST MIGHT WORK! OF COURSE, THEY ALSO MIGHT KILL FOR YOU "KEEPING ONE OF THEIR OWN CAPTIVE," BUT I'M REASONABLY-MOSTLY-KINDA SURE THAT WON'T HAPPEN
 
ME: ...IT'S GREAT TO HAVE YOUR REASONABLY-MOSTLY-KINDA CERTAINTY BACK, PROFESSOR. ALSO, NO, THE DALEKS JUST SAID THEY SOLD IT TO A SILENT. DAMMIT.
 
blienky27: WELL THAT'S PROBLEMATIC, SEEING AS HOW I'VE EVIDENTLY NOT GOTTEN ENOUGH OF MY MEMORY BACK TO KNOW WHO THOSE ARE. WHAT DO THEY LOOK LIKE?
 
ME: WELL, I SEEM TO HAVE KILLED A BUNCH OF THEM AND WRITTEN DOWN LONG JOURNAL ENTRIES ABOUT IT...I DON'T REMEMBER ANY OF THIS BUT APPARENTLY THEY LOOK LIKE SLENDERMEN IN DAPPER SUITS. ALSO APPARENTLY THAT'S HOW I GOT THAT BRUISE. HUH. I WAS WONDERING.
 
blienky27: WELL THAT'S DISTRESSING. BY THE BY, DO YOU KNOW WHY MY PALM IS FLASHING RED?
 
ME: IT'S PROBABLY NOTHING. YOU SHOULD IGNORE IT.
 
blienky27: RIGHTY HO. I'LL JUST HOP INTO THE BATH TO GET THESE SHARPIE MARKS OFF OF ME. I SEEM TO HAVE GOTTEN INTO A DOODLING PHASE, ALTHOUGH TALLY MARKS ARE A PRETTY BORING DOODLE, DON'T YOU THINK?
 
ME: ...WAIT, PROFESSOR. THERE'S SOMETHING IN THIS JOURNAL ENTRY ABOUT TALLY MARKS...OH MY GOD...UH...OK...YOU NEED TO TURN AROUND AND
 
blienky27: ALL RIGHT I'LL GIVE IT A SHOT BUT I DON'T SEE WHAT COULD BE SO SCA
 
ME: ...SORRY, WHAT WAS I SAYING? I TOTALLY LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. LOL. I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS.
 
blienky27: HUH ME TOO. I GUESS I'VE ALWAYS BEEN SCATTERBRAINED.
 
ME: UM, THIS IS AWKWARD...THERE'S A SILENT IN FRONT OF ME NOW, AND...HE'S INVITING ME TO HAVE TEA WITH HIM. SHOULD I...?
 
blienky27: OH TEA IS ALWAYS LOVELY. ASK HIM IF HE HAS ANY BISCUITS! DEFINITELY ACCEPT IF HE HAS BISCUITS
 
ME: HE DOES INDEED. HE'S ACTUALLY VERY NICE. HIS NAME IS JEFF.
 
blienky27: OH HELLO JEFF! I'D SHAKE YOUR HAND, BUT IT'S A BIT HARD TO DO THROUGH THE PHONE, ALTHOUGH THE CROFTZIS ON THE PLANET NAX HAVE INVENTED A MACHINE THAT TRANSLATES HUGS TO ELECTRICAL IMPULSES. FANTASTIC GREETING CARDS THEY'RE GOT, YOU KNOW
 
ME: I REMEMBER THOSE CARDS. I ONCE ACCIDENTALLY SENT SOMEONE ONE FROM THE *AHEM* ADULT AISLE. IT WAS...AWKWARD, LATER. JEFF SAYS HI.
 
blienky27: TELL JEFF THAT HIS FRIENDS CARL AND STEVE ARE HERE, ALTHOUGH THEY DON'T SEEM INTERESTED IN TEA
 
ME: GODDAMNIT STEVE
 

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We are crazy people - were you aware? I am keeping this conversation forever.
FOREVER AND EVER